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Looking like an old pro on the InternetYou can always tell newcomers to the Internet. Now don't get me wrong. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a newbie. It is a good and honorable profession. And, if you're like me, you don't care what people think. Heck, you're never going to meet them anyway. However, part of being a newbie is stumbling around in the dark, making mistakes, being inconsiderate and generally having a negative impact on everyone else's online experiences. My objective is to do nothing more than give you some hints that will help you enjoy Internet, as well as improve the experience of the people you interact with. Hey, you might even make a pen pal! There are certain things that newcomers do that just frost the shorts off of "veterans." And I'm not talking about having an email address from AOL or Hotmail. That might make you look like a newbie, but it certainly isn't inconsiderate. But there are customs that you need to know about, and things that you can avoid doing, that will make you look like a pro. But most importantly, will help you avoid being rude, obnoxious and irksome. And I'm sure you don't want to be irksome. Beware of forwarding stuff One of the most common ways that newbies distinguish themselves is by forwarding chain letters, virus alerts and hoax and scam warnings. Try to avoid the messages about sick little girls that are collecting emails and just about anything regarding Bill Gates. Don't forward an email about the latest scam that is going around regarding Y2K or the phone company. It gets worse in December when everyone is sending cute little animated GIF's of programs of Santa Claus and some obscene looking reindeer. Aside from the concerns about safe computing (be suspicious about ANY attachment - even from someone you know), your correspondent might have a slow link and doesn't want to deal with the 250K file you're sending them. When forwarding, include a summary of what you're sending. Don't send a jumbled email message that the readers will have to spend months decoding. Tell them what it is in a sentence or two. If it's an attachment, tell them what is or does. If it's worthwhile to forward, it's worth a moment of your time to summarize the reason why your forwarded it. Use Blind Copies If you just have to forward something (hopefully it's a joke and not news that an asteroid will hit the earth on Tuesday), please use the blind copy function on your emailer. Most mail packages today give you the ability to send a message to multiple people without having those addresses appear in the message, ala "CC:" If you have a "BCC" field or option on your mailer, use it. People are getting very protective of their email addresses and you won't keep your friends if you broadcast their addresses to all of your other friends. Spammers love to get these kind of messages - gives them tons of email addresses to harvest. I myself have accumulated a pretty large file of addresses that I can use, if I ever want to go over to the dark side and become a spammer If your email program doesn't
have a blind copy function, maybe it's time to upgrade. Or, don't
send the dang messages.
Email Signatures Signatures are essentially email business cards. Put all the appropriate contact information on them, as well as a short message about your company. If you're using email for personal purposes, try to avoid slogans and cute sayings. They may sound brilliant now, but after about 6 months, they will set people's teeth on edge whenever they get a message from you. If you're going to tell jokes, or come up with snazzy sayings, keep changing them. I subscribe to one particular mail list where the administrator includes a different funny line EVERY time she sends a message - about 3 times a week. She makes her messages interesting. If you're going to try to make entertaining signatures, you're going have to work at it. Otherwise, make a simple business card that is simple and straightforward and forget about it. Finally, beware of creating images using "-, |, /, ~" etc. They might look good on your screen, but may look like garbage on the receiver's monitor. Cute signatures are like Garfield stuffed animals stuck on your car's rear window. Participating in Forums and Mailing Lists If you join one of these online communities, such as "Tire Irons for 1974 Escorts", you might be tempted to immediately ask, "So, I'm new here...what's the best tire iron for a 1975 Taurus?" You've just violated two rules. First of all, you've asked the same basic question that every new member has posed since they started the forum in 1987. Secondly, you're not on topic. These people don't know or care about Tauruses - they like Escorts. Pay attention to the forum. Don't just jump in. Carefully read messages for a week or so, and review the past messages or archive of the forum if one is available. The odds are that your question has been asked before and you'll get a feel for the types of questions that the forum members are interested in answering. Dealing With Your Emotions One of the problems with email is that it can become very conversational. When you're writing letters, the very nature of the activity forces you to think about your words and probably go through one or two drafts. Certainly a crossed out word or two. You think about your words and the effect they'll have. But with email, it happens fast and many of us just type and send. However, emotions that you thought were obvious may be invisible to the reader. Alternatively, they may read attitudes into your message that you had no intention of conveying. Here are a couple of rules to live by: 1. Never, EVER, chastise or criticize someone via a public Internet forum or, in most cases, by private email. First of all, why do they care what you think? Secondly, it's none of your business. Thirdly, if you don't know them, you might be putting your foot into your oral cavity. I once saw a young kid read a guy the riot act because the kid thought he asked a stupid question. It turned out that the other guy happened to be a world recognized expert on the subject, and if the knuckled-headed little whippersnapper had thought about the message and the way it was worded, he would have avoided the storm of rage that was directed at him by other members of the forum 2. Even if you don't feel like you're criticizing someone, they may perceive that you are. Never speak in a condescending tone and NEVER use CAPITAL LETTERS to make a point, unless you're me. 3. If you just have to get something off your chest, write the message, then save it. Let it percolate for a day, then reread it. I guarantee you'll edit it down. Remember, on the Internet, no one can hear you scream. You also can't get those email messages back once you've clicked on the send button. 4. If you find yourself repeating a little bit of what the other guy said, writing a couple of paragraphs in response, then doing it again with another excerpt from his message, just stop it. You're in diatribe mode and you don't know it. Think about it (see above) and you'll probably tone it down. Select only a couple of his points and respond to them, quoting only a little of what he said. 5. Use emoticons such
as " ;-)". If there is any risk of my messages being misinterpreted
as criticisms or mean remarks, I'll throw a smiley face in to make it clear
what I'm really thinking. Remember, they can't hear your tone of
voice, they can't see your face and they don't have a clue about your body
language. So give the reader as many clues as possible.
Including the Other Message in Your Message If the other person wrote 3 pages, don't include all 3 pages in your response. Just include the person who wrote it and the relevant sections. Otherwise people will spend too much time searching for your comments, which probably won't be worth the effort. You'll occasionally see a message where someone has copied the entire 3 page message from the sender and then added "me to". Upper Case THIS IS THE MARK OF A REALLY NEW PERSON ON THE INTERNET. THEY'VE EITHER FORGOTTEN TO TURN OFF THE CAPS LOCK KEY, OR THEY THINK THAT THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO TYPE IN UPPER CASE BECAUSE THAT IS THE WAY THEIR ELECTRIC BILL IS PRINTED. Read Your Messages Carefully Before responding to an email message, reread it to make sure that you fully understand the it. I see way too many messages where the responder has missed the point entirely and is actually arguing the same position that the original writer is. Proof Read Dang it! Read your messages at least once before you send them. If you expect me to read the silly thing, the least you can do is reread it to make sure that what you've written makes some semblance of sense. It would be nice if you spelled stuff right and that your grammar had some relationship to common usage. This may be too much to ask, and I may be a voice crying in the wilderness, but please give it a shot. Back in the bad old days when I was a manager, I actually sent messages back to people and told them to rewrite it or I wouldn't read it. Unfortunately, I don't have that leverage anymore, so I will depend on the kindness of strangers. The whole point of this article is not to make you look like a pro. Yeah, that was the title, but I just sucked you in. My real desire is to show you the error of your ways and help you be a little more polite and consider of others while you're participating in online communities. Most of us are aware of the social niceties that go along with being considerate of others when we're face to face. We should also be nice while we're online as well.
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